Jokes

[drewMember]

storky wrote:

I told my girlfriend I was getting a KTM, she suggested we start seeing other men.

Where’s the Unthankyou button!!

Or is it that you are just sick of KTM riders being right up your exhaust pipe all the time??!

[andrewMember]

xy-transit wrote:

storky wrote:

I told my girlfriend I was getting a KTM, she suggested we start seeing other men.

Where’s the Unthankyou button!!

Or is it that you are just sick of KTM riders being right up your exhaust pipe all the time??!

yeh that’s right xy always behind. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :whistle:

[Brett WilliamsMember]

A man received the following text from his neighbour:
“I am so sorry Bob. I’ve been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife, day and night when you’re not around. I’m not getting any at home, but that’s no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology with my promise that it won’t happen again.”

The man, anguished and betrayed, went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun, and without a word, shot his wife and killed her.

A few moments later, a second text came in:
“Bloody spellcheck. That was supposed to be ‘wifi’, not ‘wife’.”

[AlexMember]

gold!

[drewMember]

Latest in the Eco friendly trail rides.

[drewMember]

:S

[drewMember]

:silly:

[murph the surfMember]

I am drunk and about to log off???????????????????????????????? :ohmy: :unsure: :dry: :blink: :silly:

Not JOKING

Goodnight, you fools :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Cheers
Murph

[murph the surfMember]

I am drunk and about to log off????????????????????????????????

Not JOKING

Goodnight, you fools
Cheers
Murph

Well maybe I’ll just hang in there a little longer. 👿
“Your a fool to cry”
So sorry to all those Stones fans, but I guess under the circumstances?????
Cheers
Murph

[drewMember]

Text the missus to see if she ‘could grab us a HD snatch strap while out shopping’.

When she got home I asked if she could find what I wanted. To which she replied that it took some working out what I wanted but after some thinking she found the best one at the right price.

When I asked to see it, with a cheeky grin she dropped her skirt to reveal a Harley Davidson G string.

[Adrian SnowdenMember]

” Morning Sex “

She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual
Soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast,
Wearing only The ‘T’ shirt that she normally slept in.

As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly,
“You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!”

My eyes lit up and I thought, “I am either still dreaming or
This is going to be my lucky day!” Not wanting to lose the moment,
I embraced her and then Gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.

Afterwards she said, “Thanks,” and returned to the stove,
Her T-shirt still around her neck.

Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, “What was that all about?”

She explained, “The egg timer’s broken.”

_____________________________________________________

[SteveMember]

Ya bastard,got a semi reading that.50 shades of f# all

[Jeffrey SmithMember]

toes wrote:

Ya bastard,got a semi reading that.50 shades of f# all

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: You funny bastard Toes

[murph the surfMember]

Shiteeee
Sittin on my setee
Tuning in to da muse
Just alwaays learny
Shall share wiff ya
Something I just learnt
Every FULL moon will always be at 8:00pm
At the gates of _____________________
Please add what ever ya thinking at the time :woohoo:
If you are too stoned then pass it on. 👿 👿 👿 👿 :whistle:
I will never grow up. Thank the Gods :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:
To break it down????????????
I have always been a joke :pinch:
FARKIN HELLL 👿
Cheerio
Murph :kiss: :blink:

[Nick JacksonMember]

Toes is struggling to operate his ribbon typewriter tonight so he asked me to post this for him

My wife and I went to the Rockhampton District agricultural show and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls.
We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that read,
‘ THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR ‘

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ….Smiled and said, ‘He mated 50 times last year, that’s almost once a week.’

We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
”THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR’

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, ‘WOW~~ That’s more than twice a week ! ………..You could learn something from him.’

We walked to the third pen and this also had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,
‘THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR’

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said, ‘That’s once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.’

I looked at her and said, ‘Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow.?’

Toes !!

[Author]

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