Jokes

[Anonymous]

[ChrisMember]

Blonde take’s her car to a mechanic….Mechanic fixes it in 5 minutes

That was quick say’s the blonde what was wrong

Not much say’s the mechanic just shit in the air filter

Blonde replies how often…..

[Mick DMember]

Gotta get me one of these! I wonder if Customs will allow these in the country, I’m thinking, NOT

The 16D Rapid-fire Nail Gun

New nail gun, made by Dewalt.

It can drive a 16D nail through a 2 X 4 at 200 yards.

This makes construction a breeze, you can sit in your lawn chair and build a fence.

Just get the wife and kids to hold the fence boards in place while you sit back, relax with a cold drink, when they have the board in the right place just fire away.

With the hundred round magazine, you can build the fence with a minimum of reloading.

After a day of fence building with the new Dewalt Rapid fire nail gun, the wife probably won’t ask you to fix or build anything else.

[ChrisMember]

A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says “But sir, its just a sperm bank!”, “I don’t care, open it now!!!” he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says “Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!”, she looks at him “BUT, they are sperm samples???” , “DO IT!”. So the nurse sucks it back. “That one there, drink that one as well.”, so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, “See honey – its not that hard.”

[ChrisMember]

A man walks into a bar with a giraffe and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much it passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door to leave when the bartender yells, “Hey! You can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The drunk replies, “That’s not a lion! It’s a giraffe.”

[Mick DMember]

Well done Badfun the sperm bank one gets Karma!! LMFAO

[Anonymous]

I want one of those nailguns!

[Mick DMember]

You could use it to hold your exhaust on…

[GregMember]

micknmeld wrote:

Quote:

You could use it to hold your exhaust on…

LMFAO

Karma old man your old and funny

TB

[Anonymous]

I could use it to Snipe your tyres

[Mick DMember]

Cool!! If you put it on rapid fire I could have one of those ice racers!!!

[Anonymous]

Might just do it to my tyre for weekend to get more grip. Will be fine as long a swe don’t go near any rocks!

[ChrisMember]

A family was driving behind a rubbish truck when a large dildo flies out and hits the windscreen. To hide her embarrassment the mother turns and says to her young kids “my what a big insect”, to which her 7 year old says, “I’m surprised it could fly with a dick that size”.

[GPMember]

LMFAO at he nailgun :laugh: :laugh:

In reply to Badfun:
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=Wrw3xzKbH3w
LOOOL

[Mick DMember]

Great find Yuri!!! I near pissed myself laughing!!!

[Author]

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