Jokes

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Viewing 15 posts - 61 through 75 (of 1,694 total)
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  • #109399

    Anonymous

    ShowerPower.jpg

    #106410

    Chris
    Member

    Blonde take’s her car to a mechanic….Mechanic fixes it in 5 minutes

    That was quick say’s the blonde what was wrong

    Not much say’s the mechanic just shit in the air filter

    Blonde replies how often…..

    #109631

    Mick D
    Member

    Gotta get me one of these! I wonder if Customs will allow these in the country, I’m thinking, NOT

    The 16D Rapid-fire Nail Gun

    nail_gun668.jpg

    New nail gun, made by Dewalt.

    It can drive a 16D nail through a 2 X 4 at 200 yards.

    This makes construction a breeze, you can sit in your lawn chair and build a fence.

    Just get the wife and kids to hold the fence boards in place while you sit back, relax with a cold drink, when they have the board in the right place just fire away.

    With the hundred round magazine, you can build the fence with a minimum of reloading.

    After a day of fence building with the new Dewalt Rapid fire nail gun, the wife probably won’t ask you to fix or build anything else.

    #106411

    Chris
    Member

    A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says “But sir, its just a sperm bank!”, “I don’t care, open it now!!!” he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says “Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!”, she looks at him “BUT, they are sperm samples???” , “DO IT!”. So the nurse sucks it back. “That one there, drink that one as well.”, so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, “See honey – its not that hard.”

    #106412

    Chris
    Member

    A man walks into a bar with a giraffe and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much it passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door to leave when the bartender yells, “Hey! You can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The drunk replies, “That’s not a lion! It’s a giraffe.”

    #109979

    Mick D
    Member

    Well done Badfun the sperm bank one gets Karma!! LMFAO

    #109981

    Anonymous

    I want one of those nailguns!

    #110048

    Mick D
    Member

    You could use it to hold your exhaust on…

    #110049

    Greg
    Member

    micknmeld wrote:

    Quote:
    You could use it to hold your exhaust on…

    LMFAO

    Karma old man your old and funny

    TB

    #110050

    Anonymous

    I could use it to Snipe your tyres ;)

    #110056

    Mick D
    Member

    Cool!! If you put it on rapid fire I could have one of those ice racers!!!

    #110058

    Anonymous

    Might just do it to my tyre for weekend to get more grip. Will be fine as long a swe don’t go near any rocks!

    #106413

    Chris
    Member

    A family was driving behind a rubbish truck when a large dildo flies out and hits the windscreen. To hide her embarrassment the mother turns and says to her young kids “my what a big insect”, to which her 7 year old says, “I’m surprised it could fly with a dick that size”.

    #110162

    GP
    Member

    LMFAO at he nailgun :laugh: :laugh:

    In reply to Badfun:
    http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=Wrw3xzKbH3w
    LOOOL

    #110205

    Mick D
    Member

    Great find Yuri!!! I near pissed myself laughing!!!

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