Some things just aren’t right

[michael ProttMember]

There are some things that just aren’t right.

My day started out early as daylight savings had fooled me. After spending the night in the garage building a bracket to mount my GPS to the handlebars, I planned on heading into Bago to get myself lost and then find my way home again. A quick check of the bum bag last night found I was in need of some plugs as the EXC had been eating them like corn chips during my recent power valve issues. So I headed to Supercheap for a fist full of BR7’s only to be greeted by closed doors at 830, dam it, it’s only 730 so half an hour of dreaming in the car yard and I had my plugs and heading for home.

It was on the way back through town that I saw the first thing in my day that was “just not right”. As I approached an intersection, here is a bloke riding a Harley with a motocross helmet on! My first thought, “Here is bloke willing to take the piss”. It’s 9am on Easter Sunday and the Oxley Hwy will soon be full of tar burners all making their own statements about their identity crises. Some have to wear black leather to ride a 250 roadie, others have to look like Rossi and ride his bike too, then there are my favorites who have to wake the dead by cutting the guts out of their mufflers and ride a bike built by Satan.

So I cruise past this bloke who was obviously having his own identity crises, I didn’t think he had spotted me as I was in my “rally car” (yes a bright yellow excel, no identity crises here people), next thing the boat anchor is on my tail and I work it out, it’s mickmeld, one of our own.

It just didn’t look right in the rear view mirror, the Harley headlight, that dreadful noise that yells “look at me, I don’t have a penis” and a motocross helmet! He even had the classic nearside overtake move down pat as I pulled into the shops. I find a park and reflect on what I had just seen. Before I could get out of the car, the boat anchor pulls in next to me. Mick and I chew the fat over “his ride”, I was pleased to learn he didn’t own it. If you haven’t got it by now I am not a Harley fan but I tried to remain interested enough and learnt it was packing 1300cc’s (my young blokes 125 probably has more HP) and the seat height is not much off a PW80’s. And whats the deal with building a gearbox behind the motor, thats what Kenworth do.

I had better things to be doing than dribbling about the most under developed motorcycle in the world, “Sorry Mick, grabbing some batteries for the GPS and am hitting the trails, might see you on your ride tomorrow”. I could see the torment in his eyes as I headed for the shops. Less than half an hour later the mobile bursts into life, “Protty, it’s Mick, what time you going?”. Half an hour later we meet at the dead centre. Mick explains, “I don’t have long, got to have lunch at the sister in-laws”, I could see excitement all over his face right there and then! (about the sister in-law’s that is).

The plan was to get over the hill and ride some single track that has not been used for a while. I had the GPS and Mick knows the place better than a sailor knows his hanky, we were set. I start hitting the GPS buttons in some kind of pre flight check as Mick starts shifting gears on the big six fiddy. It was about now that I learnt my second lesson for the day in “something’s not being right”. Lead riders should not be allowed to ride XR650’s. Workcover should be called in to declare a Safe Working/Riding Zone behind the bloody things, The roost is a disgrace! I soon worked it out, stay outside 30 to 40 metres in the open and about the same in single track. The thing throws rocks like a towel head throws grenades and no one is safe, I even started feeling pain for any living creature out there as the big Red Rhonda went about it’s way (not sure how much rider input at times). The area familiar to me soon gets left behind as Mick keeps pointing the big girl deeper into un-chartered ground.

I found myself chuckling inside my helmet as I watched Mick throwing his knee or leg out as he came to certain corners, what is this, a Casey Stoner tribute? Took me a while to work out the poor bugger can’t take his hands off the bars of the 300 plus kg’s that is trying to kill him in every corner (ok, maybe 140?) and all he was trying to do was give me the heads-up of a change.

You know those times when things go wrong and time stands still? We are peddling along an open section in fourth (ish) when big red flicks up a stick. Well it turns out to be more than just a stick, it’s half a tree about five foot long and three inches thick. The thing stands on it’s end in a balancing act as the Kato and it’s pilot approach on a collision course. I start kissing things good bye as the bloody thing hits my right hand guard and slams on the front brake! The front end dives lower than a druggie’s bank account but somehow I manage to save it, it leaves me wishing I took the time to fit the bark busters after the MX last weekend.

As we drop into a rain forest section that looks like a movie set for one of those freaky science fiction movies, it occurs to me that between the two of us we have Jekyll and Hyde covered. The big girl out front was shaking the ground and spewing out rocks the size of basketballs, while the EXC250 smoker with the “aggressive” power valve spring was like a sidewinder missile skimming over the ocean until it hit something. The bark of the 650 and the crack of the 250 was becoming some kind of weird “offroad junky music” as the single track was swallowed up.

After a few of Mick’s all to familiar “smoke stops” we check the time. It’s about an hour out from when Mick was due home and even the GPS is confused about where we are. “She be right” as his smoke runs out and the helmet goes back on, we head off. “Not sure about this one” he yells as we cut down into something so overgrown I was not sure it was a trail. Mick had told me about some section that was just smooth, moss covered rock that claims all the unaware. Guess what, Mick showed it to me by throwing away the big girl and hurling himself into the scrub. No damage apart from a busted helmet peak but Mick, thanks for showing me first before I found it.

I’m not sure if it was the sister in-law’s lunch calling but we were soon roosting along some open fire trail and heading for home. Workcover will need to update their reports for open fire trail, try 100 metres as a safe work area! The cops need to update their ticket book too, a 650 rider wheel standing on a fire road with someone behind them is now an offence!

Time really did have us beat, but there was more to come, yet another example of “something’s are just not right”. Mick power slides around a few sweepers that start looking all to familiar then next thing, we are on the tar! No trail ride should ever, never, finish on the tar!

This is becoming worse than the Harley and the Helmet scene!
We work our way through Bago bends, the big girl out front somehow looked more at home than the Kato felt. It’s just not right holding a two stroke open on the road, the poor thing was crying for more gears as we neared the edge of town. God I hope the sister in-law appreciated our efforts to get home.

I peeled off from Mick and found a bit of single track for the last few k’s back to my place in some kind of attempt to wash my sins away for riding the bitumen. It was just not right hearing the knobbies on the tar, but then again, the day started seeing a Harley rider with a motocross helmet!

Thanks Mick, more good times and memories and that’s why we are here.
Cheers
Busy223

PS. For those that might be interested I have attached a photo of the GPS mount I made, total cost about two bucks after using an old bark buster mount, cutting up an old hip pad from a pair of nylons and bending a piece of aluminum. Some might say using a GPS is cheating but after spending years needing arrows and bunting to find my way home, I need all the help I can get. [img]http://www.obtrailriders.com/media/kunena/attachments/legacy/images/IMG_1219.JPG[/img]

[Mick DMember]

Top story Busy, I was cracking up reading that!! :laugh:

If you had of seen me at midnight the night before, when the missus and I where getting thrown out of the pub,you’d be amazed that I could even ride a motorbike the next day.

Anyhow, I best explain my actions for the day. I got up early as usual and looked at a shed full of motorbikes and thought “what a cracker day for a ride”. The missus was still asleep so I thought I might just sneak out for a quick burn on the Harley. Doing my best to warm a Harley up in my back yard without waking my missus was a challenge. (I musta done OK as she didn’t get up me when i got back.)

The whole idea of riding the Harley about in the early hours was to check out all the “meeting spots” to see who was out riding today.. Freddy no friends I have become, I thought as I saw a few familiar vehicles parked about the place………Guys it isn’t my Harley..I haven’t joined the dark side!!!

Anyhow, after turning around at the Wauchope cemetery, I spotted busy223 sitting in his fully sik Hyundai talking on the phone at the local supermarket.
At this stage of my ride on the Harley I hadn’t seen anybody I knew, so I pulled in to show off the fact, that I was riding a 13 year old busted arse Harley with 89.900km on it. Actually I needed some smokes, as some bludging bastard had stolen mine at the pub the night before is the real reason I stopped there.

As the song goes , “out of little things,big things grow” I had a quick yak to Busy and he said Ihat he was gunna go for a ride on his own and that got the juices flowing. I rode home and felt out the situation at home. The missus was in a good mood even though she was a bit dusty from the night before, so I mentioned maybe I could go for a quick ride with busy223 before lunch as we had to be in Port Macquarie for lunch at my sister in laws at 1.30 pm.

Then to my amazement she agreed and to top it off she said if you get home late just ride the Harley to Port after the ride!!

AWESOME!!!! A get outa gaol free card!!!

So I jammed a bowl of cornflakes into me and I was gone!

I stopped at the sevo to fill big red up and to my amazement the fuel fairy had been and all I could squeeze into her was 75c worth of premium. Dunno how that happened. :blink:

I met up with busy at the meeting spot and we were off to Comboyne rock and back. A 80 km ride that we had to do in 3 hours so I could be back for lunch at the SIL’s place in Port.

As it turned out I am stoked that I went as we had a ball and I managed to link up a few new trails to add to my loop. WE did Rowans hill and once again I had grief, got stuck in a rut and dropped the big girl on her side. Fuel was pouring out so I turned the fuel off and turned her down the hill for another bash. I got her started and headed back up and was doing it easy when she started coughing and farting as she ran out of fuel. I did the same as Crash did three weeks ago and forgot to turn the fuel on again. Some creative use of the kick started and decomp lever saw me away again and at the top off the hill. I was huffing and puffing like the timbertown train, a quick durrie and a yak to some 4x4ers and I was right again. A quick look around Comboyne rock via Elk horn Trail saw us heading back to Wauchope in a hurry as my day was catching up with me. A bit of a tumble on a trail saw me do a face plant and snap my peak on my helmet but no other damage.
I could tell by the position of the sun that my deadline was getting close so I main trailed it back to the Bago Road, a 10km run on the tar through the twisties was fun on the big girl.I was hooking in pretty well , knowing Busy and the 2T 300 would be miles behind. I got a hell of a shock when I looked over my shoulder to see Busy right there.
A quick stop at the Old Oxley Highway saw us part company and head different ways. I rode into the shed, ran inside, had a quick shower, kicked the Harley in the guts and was on my way to Port. Arriving just in time to see the hors douves being served!! What a cracker of a day, seeing as though I was at a loose end when I got out of bed.

Thanks Busy I had a great morning,

[MalMember]

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Good read guys. I have visions of Mick on the Harley looking cool with the MX helmet on. :laugh:

You’re right busy about the Pigs throwing rocks. You either have to get right up close, be in front or way way back. Once they raise the rippers and put her into 16th gear and get her near max revs (around 850 rpm), LOOK OUT!!!!

[Author]

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