Friendship the Scottish way.
Are ye tired of those piss weak ‘friendship’ poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here are a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship… You will see no cute wee smiley faces on this card .. Just the stone cold truth of a great friendship.
1. When ye are sad — I will help you get pissed and plot revenge against the bastard who made ye sad.
2. When ye are blue — I will try to dislodge whatever is choking ye.
3. When ye smile — I will know ye are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.
4. When ye are scared — I will shake the piss out of ye every chance I get, until you’re NOT.
5. When ye are worried — I will tell ye stories about how much worse it could be until,
YE STOP YER WHINING!
6… When yer confused — I will try to use only wee words.
7… When ye are sick –Stay the fuck away from me until ye are well again.
I don’t want whatever ye’ve got.
8… When ye fall, I will laugh my effin head off at you, you clumsy arse,
………but I’ll help you up.
9… This is my oath…. I pledge it to the end.
‘Why?’ you may ask;
Because you are my friend.
Friendship is like pissing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth…
Send this to 10 of yer closest friends,
Then get depressed because ye can only think of 4
